Sigh. Finished my first Daisy Scout meeting today. I only had 5 girls, but it was still pandemonium. Lesson #1 of the Day: 5/6 year old girls are just as nuts as 1st grade boys playing baseball. As usual, the scene I pictured in my head didn’t match up at all with what actually transpired.
The scenario in my head:
Five nice, quiet girls sit down, eat a quiet snack, do a quiet craft (neatly), and then sit in a circle to learn all about Girl Scout traditions. Do the friendship circle to close and disperse. (God, typing that I do realize what a total moron I am. I mean, I do have one of these creatures don’t I?)
Girls running throughout our meeting place (the school cafeteria), constantly having to go to the bathroom, only to be found playing with water and paper towels. Throwing a beach ball at each other, even when said ball never did get used for its original name game ice breaker purpose. Diving right into the craft upon entry to learn Lesson #2 of the Day: Glitter glue NEVER dries, but will get on EVERYTHING. Which leads into Lesson #3 of the Day: Bring paper towels to arts and crafts times. Which leads to Lesson #4 of the Day: YOU SUCK AT ARTS AND CRAFTS JENNIFER. WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?! You bought a hole puncher that was too small. You brought glitter glue for 5 year old girls to use. You didn’t buy enough rainbow yarn for the necklaces and for the love, seriously girl, glitter glue?!
Then we dive into snack. Everyone chugs juice boxes like they are going 10 rounds with Mike Tyson. Cheez-Its are ravaged. (OK, I’m being dramatic, they just ate the crackers and juice quickly, but it was NOT IN THE ORDER I HAD PLANNED.)
Then, what the hell, there are 20 minutes left, let’s just go to the playground and run around.
I did manage to cram 10 minutes of actual Girl Scouting into the last tiny bit of our meeting. We did the friendship squeeze, learned the Girl Scout Pledge (crap, Promise, I will get this vocab down soon I swear) and got our hands to do the motto thingee (again failing at the vocab.) They all seemed to like the squeeze thing, so it gave me hope that with a little control and organization, they may just like this whole thing.
Apparently, the guide books that told you to establish rules at the onset were on to something. It’s like I’ve never met a kid before. Yeesh.
Overall, the parents were nice, grateful that I took the helm and seemed ok with the fact that this first meeting was not the finely tuned, efficient machine I had envisioned in my head. Thank God.
Thank God also for Pinterest (which just made me panic at my inadequacies and lack of planning, but which I think will prove helpful for the future), a great program and support system by our local Council and most importantly, for the mom who promised to be my second in command and who also seemed genuinely excited to help come up with arts and crafts after I professed how bad I suck at them. GOD BLESS YOU MY NEW BEST FRIEND!
SIDEBAR: Are we noticing a trend in my volunteering? Girl Scout Troop Leader who sucks at arts and crafts. Boys baseball coach who can’t catch or throw a baseball. Why can’t I stick to volunteering at what I’m good at? Is there even a school age club for dirty books and napping?
Guess I have to stick to things outside my comfort zone, which is why I continue to make these seemingly awful decisions. Cause let’s face it, if I don’t, I will end up the hermit cat lady who is dead for a month before anyone notices she’s gone. I will constantly strive to break out of my introvert shell to avoid this grime fate.
So to sum up, glitter glue + insane expectations = a humorous tale to make you feel better about your own lives.
Hope you enjoyed!
You crack me up. Love ya
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LOL. This is awesome, and I love it. This is totally my same situation, but with homeschool. I always envision my little ones cozying up on the couch while I read them a history book that they are naturally very interested in, and they ask lots of questions that I don’t even know the answers to, and together we research the answers.
In actuality I read the book very loudly, to be heard over my two year old daughter singing “Let it Go” at the TOP of her lungs, while my son rolls around on the couch every so often hitting the book with his flailing feet.
LOL @ “this is what an idiot looks like” photo and caption.
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